Step away from the red neon signs of Soho and step into the Willy Wonka of sex shops…pun intended. A store where whilst purchasing your sweet treats from the adjacent café, you can also explore your bedroom needs.
When you step past the array of flowers as you enter the niche Pitfield café you wouldn’t think that just beyond, through a curtained doorway, would lie a store filled with sex toys and bedroom essentials.
As you sit enjoying your coffee you can see through the curtain in to Sh!, but from an unknowing observers eye you wouldn’t think it was anything other than a sweet shop, the Willy Wonka of sex shops in fact, according to store manager Renee Denyer. Hanging signs swing above the counter advertising their delivery offers and classes. The lighting is dim and inviting allowing those curious to investigate and feel relaxed as soon as they enter.
The store was set up in 1992 and has been female focussed ever since, some policies have changed slightly but the store itself and all the products are aimed at women specifically. Twenty-six years ago founder, Ky Hoyle, was wondering around Soho with a friend on the hunt for some toys. Even though the sex stores they found were fully stocked with toys and had more or less what they were looking for they didn’t feel comfortable. There were no female shop assistants and all the toys they could find were dildos clearly designed by men, boosting their own egos, rather than helping women. Those who worked in the stores said that they don’t often serve “your sort”, implying that only men venture into the shop buying things for themselves or buying gifts, that were let’s be honest probably not well received. After the long day, Ky went home and had several glasses of wine, to recover from the day’s events, which is when she had the idea to set up her own sex shop. The concept behind it being that the store would be run by women for women. So, with £700 in her pocket and some pink paint she got to work creating Sh!
Once you step in to the welcoming store, you are greeted by the friendly female staff members, who have all undergone specific training for their stock. There is no point in staff who haven’t got the faintest idea of what they are selling. Before, men weren’t allowed in the store unless they were with a female partner. However, due to commercial pressures as well as more and more people becoming non-binary and needing a safe space to buy toys, the door policy is less strict. But don’t be fooled, if Renee sees anyone behaving inappropriately they will be told to leave as they are clearly there for the wrong reasons.
The store doesn’t have an over 18s policy so if you are there for the right reasons you can explore inside. The Sh! team will be happy to talk to anyone if you are sensible and it is clear why you are there, whether that is just some advice or you desperately need to buy some emergency tampons.
Walking around the store you can’t take in quite everything that they have on offer, so take your time. There is a variety of dildos and vibrators for different experience levels, shelves of books filled with tips and tricks, a dazzling selection of lubes all designed for different bedroom adventures and none of it will break the bank. The lubes start from £2.50 and the vibrators from £7, so if you are low on funds but still want to experiment you can easily with the help of Sh! As well as the toys, books and lubes on offer there are the female basics, such as condoms, femidoms and sanitary products.
Sh! is different from other stores because they do so much more than saying ‘here is a dildo, you need to buy it’. The team will talk to you about any problems you may be having or what your personal needs are and guide you towards a product that is right for you. Renee explains that “the store is about sex positivity and finding the right toy for the person rather than saying this is the latest shiny model, buy this. When actually that’s not right for you, you should buy this tiny little cheap thing.” Renee went on to talk about how often mothers will ask for the team to talk to their daughters. “There are times mothers have called up and have said my daughter is now a teenager and she is starting to ask about sex, can I take her to your shop and you can explain.” The team is always focused on the educational side of things so will be more than happy to answer any questions you have, without encouraging you to buy anything.
There is a range of classes hosted by Renee, including orgasm classes and classes to support women with vaginismus. They are honest, accurate and extremely helpful to all of those who attend. Most of the classes are £35, but the information you will leave with and the fun you will have whilst you are there will be priceless.
Sh! is there for everyone. You may know exactly what you want, you may have burning questions or you may be shy and nervous and just need some support. Renee and her team are there for you, if you want to pop in or chat on the phone don’t hesitate.
The store has recently moved and is located at 31-35 Pitfield Street, London N1 6HB. Walk into Pitfield Café and go through the curtained doorway to your left.